Gather round my flaky-lipped friends. I have a little something to share with you. I’ve been through the desert. And by desert, I mean I’ve been through the proverbial desert of winter and the curse of shriveled pout it brings. Sure, we all suffer from flaking and peeling to varying degrees. But my chapped lips are particularly bad. So bad, I have to stop myself from pulling at the peeling skin in public. That’s so gross, I know. I promise I’m working on it.

So, here’s the good news. I’ve been slathering on a certain (obscenely priced) lip balm for the past three weeks. And during this period the flaking has died down significantly. Chapped lips, be gone. It’s La Mer, everybody. La Mer. The triple-your-piggy-bank brand that hooks you in and ruins your budget forever. 

To be honest, this godsend of a lip balm works wonders on its own. It smells and tastes like vanilla mint. It’s full of their patented Miracle Broth and Lip Lipid Complex which renews, protects, plumps and nourishes like nothing else. I’m not regurgitating these adjectives from a press release. It really does ALL of these things. And in the three weeks since using this, my lips have been getting softer, smoother and less flaky, proving that this formula is anything but cosmetic.

Need a little something extra? Try scrubbing with a soft toothbrush and sculling a glass of water. Exfoliate three times a week with the French Girl Rose Lip Polish or the newly-released Frank Body Shimmer Lip Scrub. One exfoliates with sugar and the other with coffee granules, which gently stimulates blood flow and sloughs away dead skin.  Tonight, since it’s Friday (praise be), I’m whipping out Frank to give my pout a little something extra, a touch of glitter for TGIF pazzazz.

Now, sit back and prepare yourself for kissers smooth as silk, smooth as a baby’s bottom, smooth as the underside of a freshly caught trout. That is: very smooth.